New Year, New hopes

I am really excited and nervous about 2010. Dave and I have made a decision that may end up being expensive but also very helpful. Ella has finished the first half of the year in her new preschool. We have seen a huge increase in confidence and definitely more talking. Unfortunately there hasn't been an increase in vocabulary. Ella is great at letting mom and dad know what she wants or needs. She has her ways. We still occasionally run into those situations where she wants something and I can't figure it out. These sometimes lead to melt downs, but they are also rare.

We have decided it's time to get additional therapy for Ella. Her speech therapist at her school did not offer much encouragement when we suggested it may help. She is really worried Ella will be too shy to respond. I can definitely see that happening, but I also know that Ella is often more withdrawn in large groups and busy places- i.e. a classroom. One on one or in small outgoing groups she will talk and make sounds as long as she feels comfortable. She loves school and we are really excited about her growing confidence and her new skills. She is like any other three old except that she doesn't say much at all.

I have grown increasingly frustrated with things being said to us. One thing that drives me crazy- "She'll talk when she's ready." I know it is always said as encouragement and with the best of intentions, but we know that Ella is more than ready to tell us what she is thinking and we want to do everything we can to help her with that. I started making some calls and got some ideas about where to start. First off- we should be able to recoup some money through insurance but most will probably begin as out of pocket. I was just going to call Beaumont's speech center, but then my good friend Barb reminded me of the Kaufman Children Center. Nancy Kaufman is always referred to in reading about apraxia of speech. This is the disorder I suspect Ella to have. In my research, I have learned that often these kids need more intensive therapy. We have an appt January 11. Nancy Kaufman will be evaluating Ella and already has called to discuss. I am encouraged by the quick response. It may not be right for her but we have to try!

Coming to terms

I haven't blogged in so long. As many friends have been saying, what is there to blog about when you have Facebook? Well, we may have something to blog about but not sure how open I can be. It still feels like an open wound sometimes that I just don't want to share. Then I have to ask myself, am I ashamed? Never. Could it help me to put it down in words? Maybe. Am I scared to share? Definitely.

It is so hard to come to terms with the fact that something is going on with my daughter. First, I am so grateful and so glad that she is very healthy, very loved, and very happy. What is hard for me is to know that now it may start to really hit her that she is different. I think when she wasn't talking at 2 we really thought she would come around with some therapy. We went to our first few classes and I saw how well the other kids were responding, and I was SO hopeful. When she wasn't progressing as fast as the others in her class, I started to worry slightly, but it was obvious she was also battling extreme shyness. Really she was also doing so much better compared to where she had been 6 months before. She was communicating with us and picking up new words faster than before.

It's almost a year now since we started with Early On. A year ago Ella would barely answer yes or no questions and now she speaks in 3 or 4 word sentences and even though she won't say "yes", she has several affirmatives. She has lots of words but still nowhere near what she should at her age. I am very proud of her and try to let her know as much as possible. Since we hit three, people expect so much from her and when it doesn't happen for her, I hurt with her. I see it on her face. She has something to say and I want so badly to help her find her voice. She is so silly and has a great sense of humor!

Why am I having a harder time now than before? I think it is becoming more obvious to us that Ella isn't just a "late talker" or simply shy. I have done some research and found a book called "The Late Talker: What to Do If Your Child Isn't Talking Yet" Right away things hit me harder than I expected. There was a chart right in the front on the differences between a delay and a disorder. Ella fit right into the disorder column. The wonderful news is that Ella does not have any other conditions that could accompany speech disorders. She is also talking which is better than some kids. Things could be much much worse.

The book at first depressed me. I kept waiting for the good news like she would grow out of it or it would mean speech therapy for a few years but then we would be done. Instead I read that she may always struggle and may have learning disabilities. Then I started to feel empowered a bit. I have been struggling with what to do next and kind of playing the "wait and see" that everyone has suggested. I am not waiting anymore. We are going to get whatever help we can for her now. Her preschool is great but they can only do so much. Now we just have a lot of phone calls and work to do!

Not Me Monday

So my friend, Barb, always does a wonderful Not Me Monday post and I keep thinking I will do one but I always run out of steam. She got the idea from another blogger whose place I visit from time to time MckMama. The idea is to air your dirty laundry by announcing things that you would never do but actually wished you didn't. It's a lessons learned really :).

Where to start? I did NOT decide to read my book the last two days instead of cleaning up something. I did NOT let me daughter watch 2 hours of Barney on two seperate days. I did NOT punish my husband for playing golf by sitting on my butt last night. I did NOT ignore the baby crying so my husband would get up and get him. I did NOT try to convince him that the baby was just teething and didn't need to eat. I did NOT sleep in until past 8 am even though we were supposed to be getting on the road by 9 am.

And then there was tonight....

I did NOT drag my children out past their bedtime for ice cream. I did NOT decide to carry baby around rather than accept he needed to go home. I did NOT pay $6 for a quart of ice cream. I did NOT forget to let the dog out for awhile and she did NOT pee on the floor. I did NOT forget to change my daughter's pull up yet again. I have NOT been putting my daughter in Pull Ups and then not even attempting to get her to use the potty. That would be ridiculous and a sign of true laziness. I did NOT tuck my daughter in bed 2 hours late. I did NOT just let my baby cry himself to sleep for the first time. Same little boy is NOT still sleeping in the living room because his parents definitely did finish his sister's new bedroom so he would be able to move into her room.

Whew! I do feel better. Feel free to play along!

Checkups!

Ella had a birthday!!! She turned 3 years old last Saturday. I can't believe my baby is 3. We celebrated with family at Chuck E Cheese, and she had a blast with her cousins. She also got a lot of loot. We are big believers in recycling toys. She got a ton of toys from my sister that used to be my niece's and then a gorgeous baby bed that used to belong to the Chicago cousins. She also got some cool clay that I have yet had the courage to get into. It says it is not messy but I think anything you have to add water to is automatically messy. So we are saving that for a day when Dad is up and can help with baby. Ella's three year check up went great. No shots thankfully but there was a blood draw and an attempt to pee in a cup. She screamed through the little poke in her finger and then was fine. All afternoon she kept trying to tell us about her boo boo that went bye. I think she was trying to explain that it didnt hurt so bad and was barely there. She weighed in at 31 lbs 6 oz and 37 inches tall. She was in the 50th percentile for both which is a huge change from when she was an infant. My girl was a skinny baby and is chunking up. She loves her eggs and cheese. We are back to working on potty training but it is tough with the baby. I think we will be doing good by the end of summer though. Luckily it is perfect weather to run around half naked.

Luke also had an appt for his 8 week check up. He unfortunately did have shots. Poor guy! He did great through the checkup but then we had to wait and by the time the immunizations came, he was really tired. I had given him tynenol before we left so hopefully that helped him deal. He weighed in at exactly 12 lbs and was 22 3/4 in. He is a really happy baby and smiles and coos all the time. I feel bad because I know he is left to entertain himself a lot because of Ella. He loves his bouncy seat and will happily kick his legs for an hour. He has really strong legs now! We are now officially pumping all the time. He gets to nurse 2 or three times a day when time allows. He likes to but often falls asleep and still needs more. I find the bottles allow us more freedom to do stuff.

Wish I had pics to share but the camera got left on by accident after Ella's birthday and we still haven't had a chance to replace the batteries that cost a fortune. Hopefully this weekend!

Feeling blessed

There seems to be reminders around a lot lately that are telling me that I am very lucky to have healthy family. I need those reminders. I try to focus on them during these really long days and even longer nights as the horrible sucking machine drains the energy out of me. Also remember it when my almost 3 year old looks at me with those sad eyes because I can't read stories to her, and her little baby brother screams because I am taking too long with the bottle after already sorta nursing for 40 minutes. I am blessed. Little Luke is gaining at an amazing rate and is a very happy baby. Ella is talking up a storm around the house. Today we got the word "banana" instead of the sign for the first time. And she is so happy- most of the time :). I keep telling her that soon baby Luke will be bigger and the three of us will go do so much now that mommy isn't working.

The nursing is coming along ok. I have almost given up so many times but then we will hang out with each other for a few and its like he knows that its his last chance the next time around. We had a very nice Le Leche League leader come help us out Saturday. I knew I was doing all I could but I just wanted to hear if there was still hope. She said she definitely understood my frustration as Luke latched on for several minutes and then just stopped and decided to scream at me and my boob until a bottle arrived. It's been very confusing. She told me she really believes there is still a chance. I am going to give it a couple more weeks. The last 24 hours we have had a lot of good nursing and even avoided a bottle or two. It's progress but it's still exhausting.

Baby is stirring so quickly going to post a couple pics. The first are little Luke. The last two were just today and you can see how big he has gotten. The last of Ella is her new obsession with folding our cloth diapers. It keeps her entertained for hours while I care for baby but it makes a big mess!

Never make assumptions

So I thought this time around, our baby experience would be so much different. What were the chances that we would run into the same issues as with Ella. Ella was jaundiced for at least 3 months for no apparent reason. This led to sleepiness that prevented us from getting the hang of nursing and lots of dr visits. Well, Luke's bilirubin jumped up the second day in the hospital and we have since had serious moments of deja vu. Lots of babies get newborn jaundice but for some reason ours jump the gun and get high really fast. We managed to avoid a night in the hospital this time but did have dr visits every day last week. I was so looking forward to an easier time nursing since I was experienced. Mr. Luke was hard to waken for feedings and lost weight quickly. We supplemented thinking that we would be able to pick up nursing better when he was more alert. He is really loving that bottle though and fighting me every chance he gets. Slowly we are starting to come to terms but its been rough and is a really harsh schedule to follow right now. We have decided we will do it as long as I can stand. I feel slightly cheated but have come to terms with it. Things will be fine. Our baby is healthy and that's all that matters.

I had moments of self pity last week. I couldn't believe we were in the same place again. The jaundice itself was not worrisome but the sleepiness was hard to deal with. Even for bottles, it took a long time to get him awake. He was lethargic and had a weak cry for a day or two, and it was really scary. We beefed him up though. He gained 4 oz in 2 days so dr was happy. I made an appt with a lactation consultant when I noticed he was not doing as well as before. While sitting in waiting area, a little girl started admiring Luke. She told me her baby sister was only 2 lbs and they weren't going to be taking her home. I then noticed the mom and my heart broke for her. She was so tired and sad. I got over my problems then and just appreciated how lucky we are that he is healthy and growing.

I am very proud of Dave and I. We have been trying to be more "green" for a couple years now. We started with recycling, then moved on to getting rid of yucky chemicals, and have been eating organic when we can afford to. So this time around with baby, I decided we should try cloth diapering. Thanks to my brother and wife we had a good start with lots of covers. So with a little investment (less than $100) we have been using the cloth diapers since Friday. It is so much easier than I thought it would be. A little more effort at changing but it is getting faster every time. Everything fits in one load of wash which is also getting to just be routine. I really like the money we will save too!

Baby Luke is 12 days old today!! Check him out sleeping on the Boppy so mom can admire him while she pumps and pumps. (Ella has now added "pump pump" to her vocabulary)

Happy Birthday, baby Luke!!!

***Actually written Saturday and just now posted :) Terribly boring birth story to follow

I know I have been awful at blogging lately. Just grumpy and impatient for baby to come. It has been one of the longest months ever. Every time I went to the doctor I was making progress, and supposedly baby was down and ready to roll since the middle of the month. He just wasn't ready.

So my due date came and went and it was time to talk about a plan. My doctor knew I really didn't want to do pitocin and would like to try to go without an epidural. I knew I could probably make it if we could avoid the pitocin. So when I went in on Tuesday I was surprised to find I had made no progress and was just sitting at 3.5 cm dilated. He really wanted to break my water on Thursday the 30th. I asked what the chances were that we would go without pitocin and he told me 75% and he didn't want to do something I was uncomfortable with. So instead he had me come in for a non stress test for baby first thing on Thurs. I knew that we would end up in the hospital if I had dilated more. Well it didn't even take that. We didn't pass the non stress test. Then I suggested they check me and I was at 4 cm. So we went in to have my water broken.

It was pretty simple and straight forward. Water broken at 12:18. A lot of waiting impatiently for something to happen. Then finally things started to roll. I am told I was really a champ but honestly it wasn't so bad at first. Then when they did get bad, it was too late to do anything about it so then I had to deal. I went from 8 to wanting to push in about 30 minutes. Dr wasn't even around and almost didn't make it cuz I really didn't want to wait :). One horrible unforgettable push and Luke was here! I really didn't even realize I had a baby until they put him on top of me!
What a wonderful moment!

Counting the days...

I didn't realize it had been almost a month since my last update! Oops.

We have been adjusting to many changes in our house lately: me being home, Dave's crazy new schedule which just changed again, and then just getting larger and more tired every day. We were really getting stuff done back in March then the last couple of weeks I was at work, I just got really uncomfortable and so tired. It has stayed that way. I have no energy after lunch. Thankfully now Dave is home in the afternoons and I can get some rest which helped immensely getting Ella down tonight.

Miss Ella- wow I can't even find the words about how she has transformed the last month. She is definitely growing up. Her vocabulary is expanding a bit, but mostly we are amazed at her sentences. She says things like "this is mine. This is mama's. This is daddy's." I have told the story more than a few times now but last week at the park she threw a huge fit when we got to the car and kept pointing at the driver side door and fussing. I told her that was mama's seat and she had to sit in her seat. She blurted out "I want drive!" I was so proud of her getting it out but so sad that it was one thing that definitely wasn't going to happen! There is also a lot of "I want more" "I need more". One of her new ones we are just noticing is you tell her something and she says "I know." There is some definite sassiness but considering she was barely communicating last fall, we will take it any way she wants to dish it out.

With Dave's previous schedule, we had some really hard weeks because I always had dinner and bedtime to run by myself. It was really fun some nights. I was so tired but so wanting to get stuff done after bedtime. I would just lay on the couch and try to find one little ounce of energy to get something done. Instead I would just end up falling asleep at 11 or midnight when I should have just given it up at 9.

We are just waiting now for baby to come. I am still needing to wash baby clothes and cloth diaper stuff. We owe my brother and Jenny a huge thank you for letting us use their covers. We have saved so much money! Now we just need to get it rolling. It really isn't as hard as it seems at all. Even Dave is reassured now.

We have some idea now what will happen next year for Ella. We just need to make our decisions. I know which way I am leaning but I need some more info. Probably will be it's own post!

Baby Update 33 weeks

7 more weeks to go! Ugh. I had my check up today. Everything was fine. Not as perfect as last time. Luke has not been as busy the last few days and I mentioned that to the dr. Since I got to work though, he has decided to bounce around almost nonstop. So no worries though.

This week has been one of the hardest. Thankfully Ella has been behaving really well. Although she hasn't been sleeping well, she is good during the day. The lack of sleep was going to happen anyway cuz I wasn't sleeping either thanks to this horrendous cold I caught. This was the worst cold virus I have ever had. I am finally on the mend (I hope) after I decided to take a day off for once and rest. By day off I mean I didn't work and Ella was at daycare. Now I am feeling better just in time for her to start sniffling. Here's to hoping it won't be as hard on her.

My last day of work is officially the 25th. It is going to be weird for me not to work and not to worry about work. I am really looking forward to it. I really love the company I work for but this pregnancy combined with the endless energy of a toddler is wearing me down. Plus Dave just started a new schedule that is really hard on us. We are hoping that when I do go back to work it will be part time and we will be able to see each other some time.

I hope to have pics to post soon. I keep telling Dave he needs to get a belly pic. I am huge!! I will try to do that soon.

Baby Update week 31.5

I had a baby checkup today. Everything was great. Actually, Dr used the word "perfect". Baby's heartbeat was strong. My blood pressure was great still, and I measured right on track. I felt relieved because I was worried I had really over done it at work this week. I was really uncomfortable and hurting last night when I got home. This baby is so much more aggressive than Ella. Right now he is kicking me right in the ribs. Ella just used to roll around real casual like. So funny how that is exactly how she is most of the time now...real laid back.

Ella went with me to the doctor for the first time in a really long time. She was so good. I was a little sad because I could tell she had lots of questions she was trying so hard to get out, but all she could really say was "mama" and "baby" the there was a bunch of babble mixed in. And as we left, she kept trying to talk to people but nothing much was coming out. I can't imagine how frustrating it is for her to know the words she wants to come out, but not be able to make them. Most of the time she is ok with it but I can see disappointment on her face when people don't really understand her. Dave and I just get her a lot more. Sometimes she will just say two words but because of the situation and where her eyes go, I can tell what she is trying to tell me. Maybe that is holding us back a bit. She is signing a lot too which means that when we aren't around she doesn't communicate much. She is so sweet though and always smiles and says what she can to everyone she meets. She is going to be a great big sister too!

Ella's New Do

So Ella has a lot of hair. I always did as a kid too. Still do really. it just grows a lot. We had been taking her to one of those kids' haircut places but the last time Dave took her she flipped out. Now it is closed. Her hair has been crazy and if I am not here to do it in the morning, Dave has to take her out and about with two flimsy barrettes. I don't think he even wants to learn how to do it. As long as Ella is good about brushing it, we will keep it long but I really wanted her to be able to have bangs she can see through! I kept telling Dave we just need to pin her down and chop her bangs, but he hasn't been home when I am and he was scared to try when I did mention it. Today after her much needed nap, I asked her if she would let me cut her hair. She looked doubtful but didn't say no right away. So I told her if she let me cut her hair, I would get out her scissors to practice cutting. She sat down in her booster seat and let me cut her bangs! She was so good and didn't even flinch. It's not perfect but she still looks cute!

Baby update week 29

I need to get a baby bump picture but whenever Dave is home, I look awful. Maybe this weekend when we are in Cleveland.

I went to get a checkup on baby today. 29 weeks- 11 more to go. ugh. I have gained 23 lbs which I think is better than I was at with Ella at this point. Still kind of high considering I have 11 weeks to go but it's manageable. Baby's heartbeat is really strong and everything with me is good. I go back every two weeks now. I remember with Ella I was so excited to go to the doctor but this time around, I think it's more work to go more often. I know he's good. He's kicking a lot. He really likes sugar. Yeah who doesn't? My glucose screening was very normal and my blookd pressure is really good. I have been pretty uncomfortable especially when trying to sleep but it comes and goes.

Ella is doing marvelous with her speech. She is just trying so hard. We think we may be up to 25-30 words now but it's been awhile since we wrote them down. She had a really rough week because she had a cold that turned into croup. It wasn't as bad as when she had it as an infant. I really got lots of cuddles that normally don't happen so there is a positive to a sick toddler. Lack of sleep wasn't fun though. She finally stayed in her bed all night last night so it looks like we didn't create a monster this week. Last night we went bowling with my coworkers who really hadn't seen her in awhile. Her little friend Rachel was there with her little brother. They ran and ran. Ella really likes the boys too. She is such a flirt. Everyone was getting hugs last night. I also played Ring Around the Rosey with the girls and Ella said "down" every time we fell down. And she even attempted her friend Rachel's name. It's easy to see that she still struggles to get the sounds out but when she is determined she can do it. She is picking up signs like crazy and except when she is really tired, she uses them to express her needs and even "thank you" and "please".

So that's it for us. Hopefully I will get some fun pics this weekend!

Sesame Street Live

Following our rough weird day on Saturday was a great day on Sunday. We had tickets to go see Elmo Grows Up at the Fox Theatre. Ella looked so cute and pretty even with the lovely scratch on her forehead. Then when we got there we had an uneasy moment when she didn't want to leave the lobby to go find our seats. I am not sure what freaked her out but once we picked her up and talked her through it, she was ok. During the first song, I watched her face carefully. We had gone last year but I knew she wouldn't remember. I wasn't sure about how she felt until the end of the first song when she just burst into applause and had the biggest smile on her face. She loved the whole show and danced as much as the small space would allow her. It was a great time. I didn't get any real good pics because she was moving so much. Even before the show, all I could get is cheesy grins and silliness but they are cute pics. Her scratch is on the right side of her forehead. It looks so much better today.







The rest of the day went great too. Ella was in a wonderful mood. We took care of all the cats we are watching this week and enjoyed watching the Super Bowl on my parents' TV while they were out of town.

Ups and Downs

So I had so many posts I knew I wanted to make but by the time Ella goes to bed, I am done. I can't keep my eyes open or I just can't get off the couch to get the camera and download pics. This pregnancy is so different for me. I am very hormonal this time around. I am a crabby ass who cries at the drop of a hat.

Ella and I have had a lot of good days and a lot of bad and I swear they seem to alternate - one good for one bad. I will just show highlights from the good days. The bad days have just involved a lot of "no" and even some huge tantrums. Fortunately only one injury.

We made cookies a few weeks ago. It was a great time. Ella was really good at listening and so excited about helping. She is a great helper all the time but when the reward is cookies she is even better.



































The pics following the cookie ones were various at play. the first one appears to have caught her in midsentence. Look how hard she concentrates when she plays!


Yesterday was a very disappointing day but ended well. I had a plan in my head but it just didn't work out. We didnt get anywhere in decent time because apparently everyone was running errands yesterday. Then nap time not only didn't happen but ended in injury that I mentioned before. Ella fell off our bed. I put her in there hoping for less distraction and she would get much needed asleep. I heard several loud thumps and everytime I checked she had knocked a book off into floor or had thrown a pillow. I was giving it one last try before I would give up and I heard another loud thump followed by screaming. I found Ella on the floor where she had hit her head on a basket. I couldn't figure out what had happened and with her crying she wasn't really going to be able to tell me. After she calmed down, i was able to get out of her that she did not jump but just fell. I even got a demostration. I was so worried she had decided to jump and the way she landed definitely could have caused internal damage. She has a huge scrape on her forehead now. I guess it could be worse.

The day ended well. We had movie night and Ella really had fun watching Wall-E and eating her popcorn. She even laughed and talked during the movie. It made up for the incredibly long day we had.

Following a really bad day is a really great day, but I don't have the energy to type and need to download more pics :). So stay tuned!

*Edited to add that I have yet again had difficulties getting the spacing right between pics. Ugh. I have tried everything! This morning I thought I would add that Ella is indeed wearing a Home Depot apron. We got it at the parade and she always wants to wear it.

Proud Mommy!

So I was going to write this post about what today means to me as a mom. I decided instead that this post and day belongs to my girl. We went to class in a great mood. She warmed up so much today and during songs she was so animated and spoke a few times. They do a hello song and she waved to everyone in the class. She was very into the snow throwing song. She spoke for her teachers a few times and signed at snack time. It was just a great class. Everyone kept telling me that she seemed so much more involved.

The last few days have been really good ones. Last night Ella said "puppy" when I was asking about the little dogs. She says "dog" sometimes but has never said "puppy" and I was really impressed she knew they were the little dogs. She also has a couple of times identified sheep as "baa baa".

I am not sure what has changed but we are definitely going to take advantage of it!

Back on track Day 2

So yesterday was the second day of us sticking to our plan for getting the house organized and cleaned and then staying that way. About a year ago we had a chore list that worked really well for about 2 weeks and then we just let it fall apart again. Last night for an hour we both did our respective chores. It took a little longer than it should because most of those chores hadn't been done in weeks like cleaning off the table. At dinner, we just push everything to the end we don't use. We agreed at 9 pm we would quit. It was 9:15 and I didn't recognize my house :). It felt really good this morning to walk around and not trip over toys. Yesterday was an easy day because we both had a decent schedule. Today will be the real challenge because it's a busy day and Dave has to work 1-10. Just had to share because anyone who knows me knows I hate to clean!

Hoping it keeps rolling

So with our upcoming addition to our family comes a HUGE problem with our house. It's just not big enough. Right now baby will sleep in our room for his entire life :). Nah we would give him a drawer eventually in Ella's room. JK. We have been making great progress in the house as far as just cleaning and getting organized. We even managed to get rid of some stuff to Salvation Army this weekend. If we do this much every weekend we can, we should be done by the time they go to school.

I have been feeling just ok the last few days. I am so uncomfortable but my energy level is better. I get a rush of adrenaline when I am accomplishing things. I am really trying not to over do it. I have a feeling that my lack of comfort comes from baby deciding to use my organs as a punching bag. Ella was always much more considerate of where she kicked or punched me. She was an active but very laid back baby. Yeah not so much this time around. At first I really thought it was just pains in general until I realized they always came with his movements. My prolapse seems to be causing a lot of discomfort as well which stinks cause I thought it was feeling a lot better. Dr said this could be a problem because baby will take up more and more room as we go along. I am just glad he is obviously growing. I just hope he doesn't get too big.

Speaking of big babies- congratulations to our friends' Barb and Paul!! Little Adam came into the world on Tuesday at 9 lbs 4 oz. Baby and family are all doing great and adjusting to life with a newborn again. Barb was so quick with pics :). He is beautiful!

I always have so much to say when I go too long without posting. Last thing!! Ella went to her first movie at a movie theater yesterday!! We had a good time. I started to worry the night before because she never even makes it through a half hour TV show. We were going with our friends, Rachel and Martha, and I knew Rachel would really be into it. Ella did really good considering the length and complex story line. We went to see Tale of Despereaux. It was very cute and beautiful to look at. I had to go to the restroom and would take Ella with me to stretch her legs and let her run a bit before going back. Once I had to take her out because she wasn't listening at all to me asking her to at least stand in front of her seat. It went fine though. She understands so much for one that expresses so little. She understands when I explain why she is in trouble for not listening. This weekend she had a lot to say but again not much we could understand. At one point though, she looked at me and said "mama, what doing?" And I looked at Dave and asked, "did she just ask me what I was doing?" There was a lot of hugs on that one. She is starting to put words together a little more often. Especially when she talks to Gibby for some reason. I hear "Hi ibby", "Bye ibby", and most fun- "IBBY SIT!!" She says that in a very stern voice. I feel bad cuz I know I yell at the dog a lot but the dog has gotten really bad about listening. Funny the paralells between toddlers and dogs. For both Ella and Gibby, they are both smart enough to know that sometimes it is worth getting in trouble :).

To help remind us of better days

So I was browsing through my pics folder to find a pic to someday post on my Etsy and I found this pic of Ella in her really cute 4th of July outfit that we forgot to put on her for the fourth, but we did manage to get it on her on a really warm day down the road. She was so cute and still had her baby face which is going away now. I thought I would share on this below zero day. *sigh* to be warm again.

Turning over a new leaf

Last week was such a series of ups and downs for me. I started the week so worried about the future because the last conversation I had at work suggested I was done at the end of January. On Tuesday when I was working at home, a coworker said my boss wanted to know when I was due exactly. I was baffled. Why would he be asking again? So come back on Wednesday and he lets me know that he found a way for me to stay until the end of March unless I find something else. This was great news because it puts us that much closer to Luke's birth knowing that we at least have this job and benefits. I am going to continue to look but honestly, although they can't say it - who is going to hire a six month pregnant woman? I wouldn't.

Having a date finally for my exit here has really helped us plan. We know what has to be done and are finally starting to chip away. This weekend I got our pantry cleaned out. It wasn't gross really but there were a lot of expired items that I just couldn't believe I missed. We also went and stocked up at Costco which was expensive but we really shouldn't have to do it that often. Our next step has to be getting rid of Stuff. Lots of Stuff. We just don't have the room. We have a decision to make on who will sleep where. I don't want to kick Ella out of her room but I also don't want to paint two rooms. I am thinking of moving her to the room that is the office and painting it all girly and pretty for her. Then they can both use the bigger bedroom as a play room as well as it will be where Luke sleeps. If we keep Ella where she is now- there is blue carpet so we either have to match that or get new floor covering.

Ella has been such a happy, energetic girl lately. We have had our moments but we are learning that Ella just can't be couped up in the house too long. This is hard considering it has been so cold and snowy lately. Example, both Friday and Saturday mornings we had several time outs but once we went out to run errands, she was a happy girl for the rest of the day and napped well on top of it. The talking is going so so. She has days where she is just a chatterbox but most of it is babble. Here and there we get random clear words and even some sentences but she won't repeat it for us. It's very odd. I am just enjoying her extreme silliness and loving every giggle right now. Soon her whole life is going to turn upside down and she has no idea.

Holiday pics finally!

I must have not taken any at Dave's mom's. I thought I did :(. We were always busy there since we had little time together this year. I did get some great ones of Ella on Christmas morning though. Santa brought Ella a Thomas Train that Mama now can't put back together!! I think we are missing a piece. It's ok though because she puts it together her way and is happy. Also Dave's mom got her a Bitty Baby little girl who looks just like her. My mom got Ella the cutest dollhouse which is a perfect size for our tiny house.

So pics of Cookie making, Ella with the train, the dollhouse, one with Grandma at the piano, and one with Grandpa. My favorite though is a pic taken the other night here at home with Bitty baby and Ella in their matching jammies. I wasn't so sure of this American Girl stuff but I have to admit it is all super adorable. She also got a little potty for the baby. I am hoping it will help start up the potty training again because we haven't had much luck since the first time she successfully went poop and decided it was just too gross to go in the potty. Seriously that was it for her :). Ok enough random rambling.